different.

there are days when the feeling is too much to bear.

this world will trick you into believing that you can have it all at the same time,

but the gag is…

you can have it all,

just at different moments.

if i were to need to hear any bit of advice as a child it would be that.

don’t fill me with a heart full of hopes that will only lead to shattered disappointments later.

tell me that i will have an amazing career.

that i will go on to create some of the most beautiful moments with the ones i love.

that i will find myself as a person.

and as a woman.

that the voice that i hide,

will fight for its way out.

it will roar and finally find its way to those that have been needing to hear it.

tell me that the love that my heart desires will find its way to me.

that i will be so overwhelmed by it that my heart only can show gratitiude

through the tears that fall from my face.

but don’t forget to tell me that these things come in waves.

that i can have them all, but not at the same time.

that sometimes they happen to take place during the same moment,

but one can easily slip as we are finding our rhythm with the other.

ease the pressure that i place on myself to have it all figured out.

help me to normalize the peaks and the valleys that we call life.

save me from my own torment.

i can have it all.

i will have it all.

it’s all already mine.

just in different spaces.

different faces.

and different lifetimes.

different.

and different isn’t bad.

different helps to build patience if you allow it.

and so here i am.

with a different mindset.

a different understanding of what life is.

and a different expectation of what god has for me.

it’s bigger.

and it’s better than i could ever imagine.

even if it comes in a different hour.

-learning to stay in my lane